When I was invited to become part of the Indies Unlimited staff and write an article every month, I felt surprised and delighted and honored. Then I wanted to vomit. I’m not good with commitment. I tell myself that I like writing too much to be obligated to it, so we’ve just been cohabitating. I write whatever I want to, whenever I feel like it — or not — no pressure.
We have had our periods of exclusivity, and I’ll admit that I used to swing dance every Friday and Saturday night but now I mostly write. Yet the choices leading to now have been more about the moment or an alternative than a decision to make writing a priority. I’d rather research an essay than dance this Friday. I’d rather edit stories than watch TV on Tuesdays. I’d rather work on character development than cook — ever. There were some big concessions, but I never fully committed. Okay, I’ll write a book, but I’m not promising to let anyone read it. Okay, I’ll publish it, but I’m not going to tell my friends about it. Okay, I’ll start a second novel, but if it frustrates me so much I cry, I swear I’ll put it in a drawer and not think twice about it; I can’t handle that kind of drama in my life.
Recently, writing and I have been in a good place. I want to write every week. The stories are humming along, I’m getting ready to publish again, and my next novel is beyond the throw-it-out-the-window stage. For crying out loud, we were in Vegas on vacation and the thing I most wanted to do was write (by the pool and in between concerts, but still…). Isn’t that enough? Why did this proposal have to come now? Continue reading “About Commitment — A Writing Proposal”