That’s pretty much how I feel each time I’m invited to do an event. Cake?: staying home in my hermit writer’s cave, glued to my WIPs, email and social networking. Death?: going to an event which makes me feel like I’m basically on display at the author zoo.
We’ve been through this – you know you have to do the event. (See my post here.) Sure, it blows half the day getting your stuff together, having the ghost of Leona Helmsley do your make-up, and dressing up like a monkey. Okay, maybe that wasn’t you. But you get the picture.
If you live on a dirt road, you don’t want to lean up against the car in your black pants. You also don’t want anyone to see that those same pants are covered in white dog fur. But you weren’t anywhere near the dog…doesn’t matter. Static electricity attracted every piece of loose fur in the house onto your pants. You are so static-charged that you could power the Las Vegas strip for an evening.
Then you get to the event during set-up time. You immediately realize that despite the fact it’s an evening event at the Country Club – it’s not formal. And, in your fitted suit, not only do you feel grossly overdressed, you’re now overheating because it’s hot as hell. You’re wishing you’d brought a change of clothes – and not for those reasons – but because the Country Club carpeting is stepping up the static in your pants and they are now clinging to you in a revealing manner from your ankles to your…well, you know. You’re afraid if you touch anything that not only could you cause a power outage, you might even spontaneously combust. Continue reading “Cake or Death? Yet Another Author Appearance”
Last week I wrote about begrudingly participating in a public event. If you missed that post, you can read it here. Yes, I was a good girl, telling you all the reasons why you should pony up and “just do it.” Well, this week, I get to tell you how I really feel.
Many things can go wrong at an event. MANY. Unforeseen challenges, faux pas, wardrobe malfunctions and more are all a possibility. It’s best if you’re prepared, of course. Here are some product suggestions which will help you prevent a number of heinous scenarios. Continue reading “Personal Appearance Troubleshooter”
We all have to do things we don’t enjoy. Personally, I loathe the thought of personal appearances. I’m quite happy being a curmudgeonly hermit. It’s very safe here in my secret mountain lair. But sometimes an invitation comes my way – and I know I have to say yes.
Public appearances and events really don’t hurt that much. They can be tedious, and usually the amount of time spent in preparation usurps the event itself. So why do them? Well, unless you’re famous – or extremely eccentric – you sort of “have” to. Continue reading “Do I Have to?”