Tag: satire

Formula for a Bestselling Horror Novel

Of course, yes, I know you’ve been waiting for this. Who hasn’t been? I’ve already shared with you the formula for writing a blockbuster action/adventure bestseller, a knock-em dead romance bestseller, a spine- and pants-tingling romantic thriller, and a Young Adult Paranormal Romance. I know – that’s really benevolent of me, right? Despite that, you thought I left out a market with huge potential: horror. Well please, patience! I can only turn out one of these labor-intensive formulas each month. They’re quite draining, you know.

Speaking of draining, this book’s got it all: vampires, werewolves, zombies – a story destined to be a bestseller once you add your personal touch to it. How can you go wrong?

Follow my advice below, and you’ll be fighting off a legion of dedicated, zombie-like fans!

Formula for a best-selling horror novel: Continue reading “Formula for a Bestselling Horror Novel”

Is That Satire or Are You Just Happy to See Me?

“I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.” – Mark Twain.

Satire n. (from the Free Dictionary)

1.

a. A literary work in which human vice or folly is attacked through irony, derision, or wit.
b. The branch of literature constituting such works.

2. Irony, sarcasm, or caustic wit used to attack or expose folly, vice, or stupidity.

Even if you didn’t know the definition of satire before you read the above paragraph, you’ve more than likely read it or watched it on television. South Park, The Daily Show and The Colbert Report are examples of modern satire. Mark Twain was considered a brilliant satirist. Jonathan Swift, of Gulliver’s Travels fame, was a gifted satirist. Dorothy Parker is a personal favorite. The Onion is a news satire organization that has been around since 1988.

It’s everywhere.

Poking fun at society’s idiosyncrasies is an age-old vehicle to reveal humanity’s foibles and is an entertaining outlet for writers and other artists in a *free* society. And, it’s a heck of a lot of fun to write. I’ve used satire to poke fun at politicians, serial killers, reality shows and the like. It’s all in good fun and readers get a glimpse of my (twisted) view of the world. That’s one of the things I love about satire: reading it is a sure-fire way to view the world through another’s eyes. It makes life more fun and I remember not to take myself or my own views quite so seriously. Continue reading “Is That Satire or Are You Just Happy to See Me?”

ScrollWerx

[Indies Unlimited is brought to you in part by the fine people at ScrollWerx.]

Hear ye! Hear ye!

The day of the side-bound print book is finally over. We can’t deny that Gutenberg had a good run, but didn’t we all know in our hearts that people would come back to scrolls?

Sure, it may seem a bit early, and a lot of people are talking about this digital print thing, but come on—how long could that last?

Authors, writers, novelists, scribes and scriveners, this is the time to return to scrolls. If you’re looking for a way to make your next book stand out from the crowd, THIS IS IT!

Why not get in on the ground floor of a sure wave? Whether you’re looking for the convenience of our portable pocket scrolls, or the majestic presence of our regal Opus model, we have a scroll to meet your needs. We can print for vertical or horizontal scrolling and our high-quality rods come in brass or ornate teak-wood. Choose from parchment, papyrus, sheepskin, or paper.

In today’s trying economy, why risk your best effort on an uncertain medium? Scrolls were here before books and will be here after books. Contact us today via pigeon or telegraph for a free consultation!

How to Write a Blog Post

[This is a satiric look at writing a blog article. Though the principles are generally true, if you’d like a more serious look at the subject, please see my tutorial How to Write a Blog Article.]

Lately, the minion brain trust has been grumbling and whining about coming up with topics for blog posts. I don’t really get that, as I am a never-ending fount of ideas. But that gave me an idea. Maybe a lot of people have trouble writing blog posts. As usual, I am here to help with a handy guide on the subject.*

First, get an idea. It can be anything, really. For example, maybe you want to write an article on how to write blog posts. Introduce the concept by stating the issue: Coming up with blog posts can be a challenge. Continue reading “How to Write a Blog Post”