Category: Fake-Outs

You’re Welcome!

Pompous Ass Publishing has just issued a statement that international sensation and author extraordinaire Bob Hammond has released his latest title: Exceptional Talent: The Bob Hammond Story.

This book is the latest among hundreds (or possibly far fewer) penned by the iconic Hammond. Exceptional Talent is actually his twelfth autobiography, joining his other bestselling (supposedly) nonfiction titles like: All About Me; You’re Welcome, World; Memoir of One Very Special Guy; and Hammond, For The Win.

The book’s foreword was written by Preston Endicott-Hayes, President of the Very Prestigious Author’s Association, who says, “The inspiring Mister Hammond was born as a mere infant. Lacking the ability to write, all his very earliest works were dictated painstakingly to his mother. Who knows what gems were lost to mankind as she left the typewriter to change his diapers? One cannot help but be moved to inspiration as Hammond relates the story of his first day at school. When the teacher explained the class would concentrate upon learning reading and writing, Bob’s riposte was, ‘For my liking, you may forgo the lessons in reading, for I was born only to write.‘ And write, he has!” Continue reading “You’re Welcome!”

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Prestigous Publisher Now Accepting Manuscripts for Rejection

The very prestigious Pompous Ass Publishing has issued a statement indicating it will now accept a limited number of manuscripts for formal rejection.

“We normally don’t respond at all to submissions of any kind,” said a spokesman for the Editor-in-Chief, Langley Whitcomb Von Throppington IV. “Still, we feel this is an important step in appearing to reach out to the public.”

In order to be eligible for a rejection letter, the query must come from the agent of an author whose work is critically acclaimed and who has a significant back-catalog of award-winning best-selling titles to his or her credit. Pompous Ass Publishing is best known as the imprint that has rejected the best-selling and most revered authors of all time.