The very prestigious Pompous Ass Publishing has issued a statement indicating it will now accept a limited number of manuscripts for formal rejection.
“We normally don’t respond at all to submissions of any kind,” said a spokesman for the Editor-in-Chief, Langley Whitcomb Von Throppington IV. “Still, we feel this is an important step in appearing to reach out to the public.”
In order to be eligible for a rejection letter, the query must come from the agent of an author whose work is critically acclaimed and who has a significant back-catalog of award-winning best-selling titles to his or her credit. Pompous Ass Publishing is best known as the imprint that has rejected the best-selling and most revered authors of all time.
18 thoughts on “Prestigous Publisher Now Accepting Manuscripts for Rejection”
I’m ashamed to admit it but I have a book coming out from Pompous Ass this fall. I tried my worst, but couldn’t even buy a rejection. I’ll never be uninvited to lunch in this town again!
This is hilarious:) Thank you for the laugh.
Oh I must submit to them right away. I can’t live without another rejection letter. I want to frame it and have it hanging on my wall by Thanksgiving. Hope they are quick to respond. Do you know what the turn around time is?
Oh dear,I do believe to be fair …You forgot that Pompous Ass Publishing does currenty accept without question any and all celebrities books that have been written by a ghostwriter and are fabricated autobiographies.
Oh yes, they published both JRR Tolkien and Dr. Seuss. A crowing feat! Er, crowning feat, LOL!
Oh, my! My fingers are all atwitter as I attempt to send them my meager offerings. I simply cannot contain myself. But, then again, I must contain myself or I wouldn’t be here…right?
Finally. Finally, I will be rejected properly. Not like Becky Lou did at the prom. Which wasn’t so bad, since she’s now Harvey Lou.
Stephen, where do you get this stuff from, lol. 🙂
I laughed all the way through this but could someone quietly decipher the code for me? Or is PAP generic?
Excellent. I’ve been having rejection withdrawals since I went Indie. At least this will fill that void for me. Hooray!
This is such great news! I have just enough space left on my bathroom wall!
Yeah, I’m with Kat on this. I’ve had my Monday morning splutter into my coffee, thanks Stephen. I can get on with my work now.
But by the time your finger is over the submit button, P.A.P. will have been bought out by Random Penguin and will no longer accept submissions unless they are delivered in person with a truckload of raw fish.
My daughter was so disappointed when she realized they weren’t going to name the merged firm Random Penguin. 😀
Random Ass Penguin, perhaps?
Oh, you have to be a critically acclaimed author to get a rejection letter. That would explain why I just got a box of angry raccoons in reply. The scars are healing nicely and just one more prophylactic rabies shot left to go.
Hi Stephen, I want to send my manuscripts on blank paper to them, what is the address? Is it End of the World Lane, Upper Dicker, Notts?
Gee, I had a feeling I knew who’d written this even before I opened the blog. Snarkadelphic!
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