Stay Tuned for This Important Message

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Book Brief: Gnomeless

Gnomeless
by Jennifer Zane
Genre: Contemporary Romance
45,000 words

Veronica Miller is a plumber on a mission–buy out her dad and the family business is finally hers. One big, handsome problem stands in her way. And it’s not a clogged toilet.

Jack Reid is the boy she mooned over in high school. He’s back in town, but he’s no longer a boy. Ten years ago he broke her heart, skipped town and never came back. Now he’s a big shot lawyer in Florida whose uncle feigned a health crisis to trick Jack into coming back into town. Upon arrival Jack finds his uncle is gone, he’s homeless, and forced to be roommates with the one woman he could never resist.

Jack discovers his lust hasn’t cooled for the sexy Veronica, but neither has her heart forgiven him. A sex-toy educational party, romance novel writing gone awry, Goldie’s meddling, an escape artist snake, a strange stalker in a fluffy pink coat, a house fire, plumbing gone awry, bitter cold, and a smart-faced garden gnome all conspire to force Jack and Veronica to work through a decade of baggage, disappointment, and unrequited lust while figuring out the mystery behind the stalker. Hilarity ensues on every page of this sequel to Gnome On The Range.

This title is available from Amazon US and Amazon UK. Continue reading “Book Brief: Gnomeless”

What’s in a name, Jar Jar?

This post is more a rumination than anything approaching “advice.” Because really, if anybody knew anything about any aspect of writing that was true in all times and places, I feel like I would have seen it in my facebook newsfeed by now. Different strokes for different folks, we’re all perfect snowflakes, yadda-yadda-yadda. But here are some things I think I know about giving names to those little imps running around our narratives, couched in Star Wars terms in a blatant attempt to hold people’s interest. Continue reading “What’s in a name, Jar Jar?”

Ed’s Really Bad Writing Advice: Exposition

(Note, this post should be read with your “tongue-in-cheek” detector on its highest setting) 😉

If there is one thing readers hate, it’s exposition. If there are two things, the other is main characters who aren’t physically attractive and they don’t want to have crazy monkey sex with. But if there is only one, it is that blasted expository writing. Continue reading “Ed’s Really Bad Writing Advice: Exposition”