Originally from Rhode Island and born in 1970, Jen Smith spent six years in California then Six years in Ohio where she began the journey of recovery. Jen went back to school in her thirties obtaining a Bachelors Degree in Business and a Masters Degree in Financial Economics. Jen is the author of the memoir, SICK:
Small time drug deals, following the Grateful Dead, and a passion for growing pot filled my world before I met Greg. But the first time I got off a flight, strolled over to the baggage claim in my carefully chosen new outfit and picked up two brand new flowered suitcases filled with eighty pounds of Mexican swag pot, I felt like I had found my true calling in life. The adrenaline rush of getting away with something big along with the money I would make was a new kind of high I’d never before experienced. I was instantly addicted. Making money organizing drug runs around the country was intense. Greg and I were a money making duo like none other. Life with Greg was exciting for a while but it wasn’t long before it became a cat and mouse game – then a complete nightmare.
Words like belittling and narcissistic were not in my vocabulary. Later, learning these words helped me disconnect from the mental torture. The tension would build as I protected him while he isolated me from friends and family. Then there would be an incident of abuse which confused me. At first it was lying, hurtful words and actions but quickly escalated to guns at my head, knives, and using my son to manipulate and control me. The honeymoon phase would be another fabulous trip to Hawaii or resort hopping around the world. I didn’t see the cycle or even understand abuse. The drugs and alcohol allowed me to tolerate and numb the pain until my spirit dwindled down to a shadow of nothingness. How could I escape the far reaching sabotage of any attempt at my freedom? Could there be a way out? Could I find a way to spare my son from this drug infested violent existence that would surely crush his soul?
SICK is available at Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and Smashwords. Learn more about Jen and her writing at her blog. You can also find her on Facebook and follow her on Twitter.
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Can't wait to read it! Someday I will have time to read again. I swear it.
Thanks JD Madder, I've got The Biker on my list!
All I can say is, "Wow!" I cannot begin to imagine what that life must have been like for you. I hope you sell many books and that many people will either be helped out of a similar lifestyle or prevented from entering it in the first place. I commend you for writing about it. I must have been a difficult process. All the best.
Thanks Diane- the writing process was healing and I do hope to help folks. You can find more on why I wrote sick on my blog. jensmithsick.com
Though the kind of abuse I suffered had no drugs in it I certainly recognize the yo-yo cycle that is so crazy-making. Glad you emerged whole. (so did I)Good luck. If your book saves one person it will be well worth it.
Glad you made it through as well Yvonne! Getting whole again took time. Thanks for your comment.
Time and effort. 🙂