Marketing products of any kind is challenging, and more so in a culture inured to the standard marketing techniques.
These days, you need to be able to reach your target audience quickly and effectively. You must tap into their subconscious desires to buy your product or service right now!
Genetic Research Associates, in conjunction with Nigerian Oil Minister Marketing International, is pleased to announce a breakthrough. By using the amazing mental powers of our genetically-modified hippopotamus to break through that wall of sales-resistance, the prospect becomes a customer in mere seconds.
But is it ethical? Of course it is! People can’t be convinced under hypnosis to do something they wouldn’t normally do. For instance, those people who cluck like a chicken when they’re put under – you know they must have wanted to do that, right? Who wouldn’t?
As an author, you know people want to buy your book, but some irrational process is interfering with acting on that wholesome impulse. Is that fair? Of course not. The hypnopotomus simply bypasses all that to get to YES!
$165,000 an hour might seem like a lot of money to invest in book promotion, but not if you care about your book. You do care about your book, right? Not convinced yet? Just look at that adorable hypnopotamus.
Look into his eyes.
9 thoughts on “Hypnopotamus”
A male hippopotamus is called a ‘bull’. Just saying.
Now why didn’t I think of that? I’m a hypnotherapist! Off to figure out how to do inductions on Facebook …
Aha! I see what you did there. 😉
Now I know why you’re called the Evil Mastermind! Did you know hippos are more dangerous than crocodiles? Just saying…. 🙂
Boy! IU is really having fun these days. What the heck have you guys been drinking? P.S Baby hippos are sooo cute.
I’m getting very sleeeeeeepy….
I wish to adopt a young hypnopotamus. Do I purchase the airline tickets directly from you? And what size carrier to I need – are you sure it would fit under the seat?
“Going my way?”
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