We know. Editors work hard. After a grueling day of reading all those words, your eyes are screaming for relief. But regular eye drops are not going to get rid of that stinging caused by all the errant commas, misplaced modifiers, and just really bad grammar. You need something industrial: something you know will make you forget what you just read. Your wish is now granted!
The professionals at Indies Unlimited Laboratories have perfected a new product just for you: Eysol Eye Wipes!
That’s right, now you can find relief after reading a horrendous manuscript! Just pluck an Eysol Eye Wipe from the container, apply to your eyes as directed, and you’ll forget every torturous word! We even left out the second ‘e’ in Eyesol so you’d have something to correct! Because we care that much! Remember, the burning shows it’s working!
Use as directed. Not to be taken internally. Common side effects include painful ocular burning, stinging, swelling, and redness; temporary blindness; sore throat from screaming due to painful ocular burning and stinging; incontinence; and memory loss.
Haha! I love the side effects. Feels almost like a real product.
Thanks for the laugh.
Is there a Facebook-browsing version?
It’s sort of multi-purpose.
LOL I love this! 🙂
Too funny! I’m afraid a few of my errant commas may have added to the problem, though. :-/
Blimey! Just what I need – thank you Indies Unlimited Laboratories!
Next you need to find a hand scrub that will take away all the dirt from the errors your fingers had to correct. I know they use “Bag Balm” on cows’ teats and udders, and on farmers’ hands but you’ll need something stronger.
We have a wonderful product called Optrex for tired eyes in UK.
Besides relieving the discomforts your describe it also has another function as identified by Spike Millignan, one of out best known comentators (and a.
He said: “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Get it out, with Oprex!”
Dealing with the side effects, you are guaranteed to forget all about what you read!