RelaXco Marketing Solutions

[Indies Unlimited is brought to you in part by RelaXco Marketing Solutions, formerly known as Division 7 of the CIA.]

Hello authors. Is your book languishing on the shelves while other, less deserving books garner critical acclaim and record sales? Marketing is a tricky business, ill-suited to soulful creative types. The good news is there is now a marketing firm that can actually help you. Established by former government researchers, RelaXco uses proven brain science to help consumers sort through information overload to make the correct purchases.

With our technology unobtrusively positioned within normal-appearing commercial advertisements, not even your competitors will know the reason for your sudden success. It will be our little secret. If you doubt us, just try to come up with another reason Fifty Shades is a bestseller. We’ll look forward to hearing from you soon.

Author: Stephen Hise

Stephen Hise is the Evil Mastermind and founder of Indies Unlimited. Hise is an independent author and an avid supporter of the indie author movement. Learn more about Stephen at his website or his Amazon author page.

8 thoughts on “RelaXco Marketing Solutions”

  1. Dear RelaXco, please help me (cheap sex). I don’t want to resort to subliminal (send women) techniques (buy my book) in my promotions but out of desperation (send money) I turn (offer sexual favors) to you. Sincerely (all major credit cards) I turn to you (operators are standing by) in the hope that your company (sock puppets) can help. Thank you (I’ll do anything) very much in advance (check in the mail). Sincerely (five stars), Ed

  2. Hey…this sounds great! It has to be cheaper an easier than offering hallucenigenic mushrooms with every purchase. I can have my basement back again! Count me in with RelaXco.

  3. You seriously crack me up, Stephen, that’s why you’re the one and only EM. By the way are you former or current CIA, or do you just have a ‘deep throat’?

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